Prince Harry's Emotional Struggles: Unwilling to Discuss Princess …

Prince Harry's Emotional Struggles: Unwilling to Discuss Princess Diana and Prince William's Reaction to Addiction Rumors (Photo: REUTERS)

In his recently published memoir, 'Spare,' Prince Harry opens up about his inability to discuss his mother, Princess Diana, and the emotional turmoil he and his brother, Prince William, faced when confronted with rumors of Harry's drug use. Prince Harry shares that, as young boys, he was often unwilling to talk about their mother's tragic death with Prince William. He writes, "Willy sometimes tried to talk about Mummy.

Club H felt like the one place secure enough to broach that taboo subject. Just one problem. I wasn't willing.

Whenever he went there...I changed the subject. He'd get frustrated. And I wouldn't acknowledge his frustration."

Harry goes on to explain that his emotional distance was not a conscious decision, but rather a result of not being ready to face the topic: "Being so obtuse, so emotionally unavailable, wasn't a choice I made. I simply wasn't capable. I wasn't close to ready."

Reflecting on Princess Diana's funeral, Prince Harry recalls feeling guilt and confusion, saying, "I cried once, at the burial, and you know I go into detail [in Spare] about how strange it was and how actually there was some guilt that I felt, and I think William felt as well, by walking around the outside of Kensington Palace." He also recounts the surreal experience of interacting with mourners: "There were 50,000 bouquets of flowers to our mother and there we were shaking people's hands, smiling... And the wet hands that we were shaking, we couldn't understand why their hands were wet, but it was all the tears that they were wiping away."

Additionally, Prince Harry delves into the topic of his rumored drug use and how it affected his relationship with his brother. He reveals that Prince William was initially angry about the allegations, stating, "At moments he was even angrier about the whole thing than I was, because he was privy to more details about the spin doctor and the backroom dealings that had led to this public sacrifice of the Spare." However, Prince William ultimately reminded Harry that criticism is an inevitable part of their lives as royals.

Harry writes, "And yet, in the same breath, he assured me that there was nothing to be done. This was Pa. This was Camilla.

This was royal life. This was our life." In 'Spare,' Prince Harry admits to using cocaine, smoking marijuana, and trying magic mushrooms.

He candidly shares his experiences, noting that his primary objective was to feel different: "It wasn't very fun, and it didn't make me feel especially happy as seemed to happen to others, but it did make me feel different, and that was my main objective. To feel. To be different."

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